I've
been tweeting some bon mots from my little ladies. I thought I'd share them
here too:
Darian
Lindle @dlindle · Oct 16, 2013
Attention Parents Who
Feel Like Underachievers: know that tonight my children and dirtier than yours.
And that's OK.
Tethys: "Hero, are you the bad guy? Give
me my purse back otherwise I will put poop on you."
One to the other: "You're
not a nice lady and I'm not a darling"
"I like cheese sticks and shredded
cheese. These are the cheeses that I like. I like those kinds of cheese because
they are good."
Retweeted by Darian
Lindle
@dlindle Sometimes I think your children should
be on Twin Peaks
Something so admirable about the self-satisfaction
of small children:
"You're like her."
"No, I'm just like me."
"Stop hating
yrself for what you aren't and start loving yrself for what you are."
Kids think like this; we
unlearn it but it's there for us.
"Mama, wake up. It's not nighttime now.
It's... Up time."
Convo w/ 3 yo girl:
I'm pretty.
You know it's better
to be smart than pretty
Yes, mama.
Are you smart?
No
...
MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
:(
"You are my Pee Mama. I put you in my
butt and pee you out with poop and flush you down the toilet!"
"Great.”
"You're welcome."
@dlindle, bah! Wow. And I thought I had it bad with
the frequent barrage of, "Mom, do we eat poop?"
At the dinner table:
"Frogs don't have
poop in their butts, they have water."
"Just like our
Papi!"
"I love my mom best of all; even I can
take her into my paintings."
That's right. I'm Mary Poppins, now.
"Papi, put your
pizza down. We need to cover them with power [a rug] because we are the bad
guys."
Retweeted by Darian Lindle
"What's that?"
"That's my nose piercing"
"Oh. Can you take it off please?"
1: Did you hear that?
Me: What was that?
1: It was a fart from
my (demon voice) SISTER!
2: Yep! It was my
butt.
Classy
Me: What are you wiggling
your foot? Are you tickling your jammies?
She: no, but if the
jammies tickle me I will be so excited!
She can't have all the
peanut butter. She can't. Otherwise I will have to use this dirty spoon to pull
out her eye.
Retweeted
by Darian Lindle
"Where the hell are we going?"
A new song: "I am
a witch. I am a very bad witch. And I eat lots of people. Because I'm
complicated!"
"I don't have a brain; I have a
calf."
"why a calf?"
"Because a calf is part of people."
Remember how the Santa
boy has nuts? I saw him up the tall ladder thing!
Darian
Lindle @dlindle · Jan 31, 2014
I wouldn't like to eat
poop. I wouldn't like to do that. That's gross. Poop is not a food! #TwinsTalk #Wisdom
I wouldn't want to
take a bath in the toilet. That would be so silly. Otherwise I would go down
the pipes and wash away.
Retweeted
by Darian Lindle
@dlindle We just caught up on three months
of #TwinsTalk.
When does the new season start?
Song: whooaaahhh
whoops haha a whoooo haha a who ha who.
"Is she singing
"Hoo-ha"?
"You know it."
Child: This isn't dirty.
Me: Well, it is. But you can eat it anyway.
Child: Mama said I can eat the dirty egg!
Now people can play with
me cuz I'm real. Pop me. Pop me because I'm bubbles!
1: The crocodile can have my sock. (puts in
grandpa's hand)
2: Here's my sock! It smells like ice cream!
(puts on his nose)
A: Mama I need to tell
you something in your ear. It will go straight to your heart & be very
nice. (in ear) goopyshloopydoo.
B: (coughs/sprays while eating) That Brussel
sprout did not want to be in my mouth so my mouth sneezed it out. Napkin, please.
Writing with the littlies http://darianlindle.com/1/post/2014/03/writing-with-the-littlies.html …
Darian
Lindle @dlindle · Mar 19
I can't go to sleep yet. I see scary movies when I close my eyes. They are on the inside of my eyelids. #TwinsTalk
I can't go to sleep yet. I see scary movies when I close my eyes. They are on the inside of my eyelids. #TwinsTalk
*3yo humming
incessantly*
Me: What is that song?
She: My new one I
wrote.
Me: What's it called?
She: Broken Yellow
Crayon
Retweeted by Darian Lindle
"@dlindle:
B: What are you playing?
Me: #CandyCrush
B: Why do you want to play squishing candies?
Good question!
Me: Do you like your
name?
B: Yes, that's why I
chose it when I was built.
Me: You were built?
B: When I picked you
and Papi.
Retweeted by Darian Lindle
T: Mama, can we go shopping? I promise that we
will wear pants. #TwinsTalk
Kid 1 tantrumed for an
hour straight.
Kid 2 sang songs about
belugas, taped paper drawings to Windows and gave random kisses. #divergent #TwinsTalk
Retweeted by Darian Lindle
H: "I love tickles. Do you know why?
Because they are ticklish."
Retweeted
by Darian Lindle
D: "You are so quotable."
H: "No, I'm not.
I'm a chicken. Brawk!"
Retweeted by Darian Lindle
Lola
Lindle @writinglola · May 16
T: "Your hand is a monster hand with monster hand babies and they are drinking milk from your hand." #TwinsTalk
T: "Your hand is a monster hand with monster hand babies and they are drinking milk from your hand." #TwinsTalk
T: No, friendship is
magic.
Me: Oh, friendship is
magic?
T: But we aren't
ponies, we're people.
Natch.
Retweeted by Darian Lindle
T: "Mama don't touch my eyes. I can take
care of my body myself."
"@writinglola:
"Meat just came out of your shoe" #overheard"
T: Are you married? Me: Papi and I've been
married for 10 years. T: 10 years! *opens mouth in awe* That's horrible! #TwinsTalk
Singing #Frozen and twins mimic
the nonverbals too. I giggle.
2: What?
Me: That was cute.
2: No, that was
amazing.
Indeed.
Kid 2:"Can I have
one of those? Can I take one home in my fingers and pet it?"
Exactly.
*spazzy moment
thinking there is a bug in my pants*
2: I wish I was a bug
in your undies. I'm too big to be in your undies now.
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